Connect - Disconnect - Reconnect
Connect - Disconnect - Reconnect
Resetting is good
Connecting
Once upon a time, there lived...me, Patrick Mathieu. I was all about connection. From a young age I was gregarious and outgoing. I loved public speaking and debating. To me, life was about connecting with other people. I couldn't wait to leave my small town and connect with the big, wide world.
Just as I was about to strike out into the world, I became deeply aware of my mortality. For a number of years, this knowledge seemed to be a huge disconnect with the rest of the world. But eventually, I shifted my perspective and realized that mortality is the single greatest thing that connects all of us because it's the one thing we ALL have in common.
Once firmly back in 'connection mode', I vowed to bring my insights around mortality to as many people as possible. I chose the world of personal development as a vehicle to share my message. Speaking, writing, workshops and coaching were all excellent ways for me to use my skills and talents to connect with people and help them connect more deeply to their own lives by engaging what I called the Power of Mortality.
And somewhere along the way, I connected with YOU!
Disconnecting
A few years ago, things began to feel very different. I was acutely aware of a sharp rise in overall polarization and deepening ideological entrenchment. In my youth, I'd seriously considered a career in politics because I naively imagined it would be a great way to connect people and help improve their lives. But in the late 20-teens, political discourse took a dramatic turn away from connection and towards division.
Remember I said I loved debating? Well, I found that more and more there was no room for debate or consensus building. Tribalism and special interests seemed to be ruling the day. People were separating into two camps and the separation was full of mistrust and anger.
At the same time, the Internet (something I was once so excited about because of its ability to instantly connect billions of people) was also becoming more and more divided. Not only did it amplify the ideological fractures, but the influence of social media was becoming concerning. Remember the revelations from the Cambridge Analytica whistleblower?
The rise of "the influencer" was ubiquitous and the world of personal development was being scooped up in that wave. In the face of articles and listicles with titles like "top five ways to improve..." or "the one weird trick you need in your morning routine", I felt pressure to package up my message and turn it into an easily consumable commodity. I didn’t want to be an influencer, but I didn’t want to be left behind either. The more I tried to make my message fit that format, the more out of alignment I felt.
I felt disconnected. Disconnected from my message. Disconnected from myself.
And then came the pandemic.
Of course, disconnection and isolation were the rule of the land for the first big phase of the pandemic. Because of my congenital heart issues, I took the expert’s advice very seriously. During the isolation, I told myself that in the long run THIS would be the thing that helps to unite humanity. We would set aside partisan politics and ideological differences and rally to defeat this viral invader. A global threat would surely bring about a global unification and response to that threat.
We all know how that worked out. The disconnect was jarring.
And once again, the Internet was weaponized. Rather than helping us feel emotionally connected during a time when we needed to be physically distanced, social media became ground zero for an all-out culture war. Eventually, I realized that for me, continuing to consume social media (particularly Facebook) was not serving me and was in fact somewhat destructive. I was stunned at the beliefs and theories being shared by people I'd once thought of as being on the same page as me.
The flames were eagerly fanned by those who sought to profit from dissension, division and polarization. Rhetoric and attitudes which I once thought of as primarily an American phenomenon began to surface here in Canada. More division. Less connection.
Oh, and while we're at it, throw in a war involving Russia. Constant tensions and sabre rattling with China and North Korea. Human rights struggles throughout the Middle East. And underneath it all, our climate emergency continues unchecked. There is no shortage of reasons for apocalyptic and catastrophic thinking.
AAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!
All of this is why I've been so absent recently.
What about you? How have the last few years left you feeling?
Reconnecting
I'm writing this at the close of 2022. In recent months, I've been able to step back from the abyss and take some time to reassess my situation - and to reassess THE situation.
In October of 2022, Jen and I spent a mind-blowing week in a rented car driving around Iceland. The experience had a profound effect on me - one that I'm honestly still processing. (You'll hear more about it in the future.) One of the outcomes was a radical shift in some core assumptions I'd been holding onto my whole life. (I promise to explain more soon.)
This shift is allowing me to reconnect with myself in a different way and to relate to the world in a different way. It shouldn't come as any surprise that Mortality is still at the heart (pun intended!) of things. But I can tell you that the Mortality Mindset of 2023 and beyond will not be a commodity that you can 'add to cart'. It's not a quick fix and it will involve deep discussions. It's messy, difficult … and ultimately worth it.
I'm going to ease into this, so I won't make any grand promises about how often I'll be writing. I imagine that will become more clear as time goes on. And I want you to understand - this is a two-way connection! I'd love to hear from you.
Here's to the reconnection - Happy New Year!